Honorary BA (Stock Trading)

International University of Self-made Stock Traders, USA*

has invited applications for the awarding of

Honorary Bachelor's Degree in Arts (Stock Trading)**

to the elgible candidates.

The eligibility criteria:-

Basic Criterea:-

* The applicant should be alive and kicking (but not being kicked by the stock markets)

* Age = Youthful

* Religion = Trading

* Caste = Winner

* Gender = Dominating (Docile traders not eligible)

* Nationality = Any country having atleast one stock exchange

* Colour of skin = Green (colour of profit)

* Language = Graphs

* Experience = All kinds of stupid mistakes big and small (compulsary)(so that there is little sscope for newer ones)

* Donation = Emotions (none should be left behind in you)

Advanced Criterea:-

* Trades less, Profits more

* Knows many Technical Indicators but uses only favourite 1 or 2 (max 3) to deadly effect.

* Doesn't Day Trade (except for fun and learning), primarily swings!

* Is married to a Mrs.Method and is absolutely faithful to her!

* No smart and flashy strategies but only dull and boring and repetitive but highly profitable trading rules!

* Doesn't need tips. Treats unwanted tips and calls as a request to give his/her opinion!

* Has forgotten how to panic.

* Has the audacity and shamelessness to smile at the crashes and wink at the corrections!

* Doesn't short (except for fun and learning)

* Isn't a Doctor (but a permanent patient - the one who has a unlimited patience)

* Is the best waiter in the town (can wait endlessly if required)

* Doesn't leverage except to a wise limit

* Has attended all the lectures on "the magic of the compunding effect!"

* Is not a spendthrift, believes in simple, frugal but impressive life!

* Graph scanning is his hobby

* Diversifies but not too much

* Doesn't watch the stock every day

* No trader terminal, no flashy software

* Know how to play with "white" as well as "black" pieces

* Doesn't have a paycheque mentality

* Bows before God every morning and then after Mr.Stop Loss"

* Has deep Emotions "for" Trading but no emotins "in" Trading.

* Has excellent imagination (Can imagine the bull "rain" during peak bear "drought")

* Has money discipline